In your relationships, do you attempt to please everyone else, but not get your needs met?
That is doomed to fail.
Make sure your needs get met first. Others second.
And ensure those who claim to care about you do the same.
This is not a license to be completely selfish. It’s not all about you; after all, I just said that the other folks should put their needs first too.
In your relationships, each person must be paying attention to their own needs, but also working to take care of the other people’s needs.
If you have to compromise that principle due to logistics (such as work or school schedules), make time and make plans so that those logistical situations are temporary.
If you care about someone will want to see those they care about succeed and be as fulfilled as possible. You do that for them and they do that for you.
There are absolutely times where the people we care about are unable – for whatever reason – to worry about us. Sometimes it’s all they can do to worry about themselves.
But that shouldn’t be the normal state of a relationship – regardless of the reason. Your relationship(s) should not shred you.
And that doesn’t mean that any of the people in the relationship are “right” or “wrong”. You are you, and you are fabulous.
Whether or not your fabulousness works with someone else’s is a different story. And that doesn’t mean your fabulousness – or someone else’s – is inherently good or bad.
If a relationship isn’t, on the average, helping you be your most authentic, happy, and healthy self, you do NOT have an obligation to try to fix it.